I had a chance to go to the meditation center this week with a friend it was nice. I was able to sit still for a block of time. We had a laugh I chatted with some new people. I felt connected. I am looking forward to going back. Recently a friend of mine asked me to help her be more social because she has a hard time with it and I feel more social and act more social when she is with me which is a good thing. I feel more confident.
During my meditation, I felt scared I could feel myself shaking, I began recalling my year and feeling grateful for all the progress I have made in a lot of different areas. Overall I had a great year filled with lots of interesting activities and experiences I had a chance to meet new people and get to know them more then I have been in the past. I have tried rowing, ti chi, i made some art. I joined a dodgeball team, recruited some friends and got more skilled in it. I had lots of fun social dancing during swing into spring and was able to host a few guests this year. I learn to cook some new dishes. I started working from home, I got 2 job interviews. I got a pay increase. watched some great movies, tried an escape room and a new trivia team which we finally won 3rd place last week. I enjoyed yoga, swimming and brunch with friends. I hosted a few parties at my apartment and got invited to some and went on some nice dates.
I ran two 5ks and a learn to run group. Joined a gym lost some weight. I went further in the bike for breath. I did a Matri space awareness, a blues workshop, I traveled to St Andrews, st John, Halifax and France.
It feels good to write it out and go over it again here now. Like wow and there is lots more to say I am sure.
Simple things like taking a shower, exercising, taking time to choose clothes that i are nice and comfortable remind me of my dignity. Since I work from home sometimes I don’t bother getting dressed and washed up since it’s just me here. But it feels good to do it for it’s own sake. I feel good and I am ready for action. I had a change to put some nail polish on and cream which feels nice as well little reminders of taking care of myself. Dignity a concept that is hard to define. Now sure this consumerist society wants us to feel bad about our selves so we buy products to feel good. I understand that – it’s revolutionary to love one self it seems. There is a difference between having to do something and wanting too so if I like it and enjoy it than it’s ok to do a little primping every once in a while. I am worth the time to feel good.